Spiritual Experience

So Josh and i had a very spiritual experience we wanted to share with you all and for the records.

Some day in march i had this really strong feeling that there was another baby that was suppose to be coming soon and I needed to talk to Josh about it! It really freaked me out and just thought it was just my hormones and the thought of my baby turning 1 soon! I was so not ready for ANOTHER baby!!! So i ignored it and it just kept nagging at me and nagging at me! Finally after 2 weeks, i could hardly think straight, so i waited until Josh was home and was fed and relaxed, i told him i needed to talk to him, i was very nervous because i knew he was going to think i was crazy and probably freak out. His reaction was what i thought it would be! He said, "what? it is too early! Houston just barely turned 1! that is crazy!" I said back calmly, "I know josh trust me when i say i am really not ready for a baby so soon! I don't want another baby yet! But i just can't shake this feeling, it's been bugging me for 2 weeks and i have been avoiding you because i knew how you were going to react! Will you at least pray about it and make sure you have the same answer please?" he calmed down because i started to cry a little and he began to tell me if this is what was suppose to happen then we will stop preventing pregnancy and let it happen on it's own. he said he would pray about it and let me know.

Well a few days later, josh comes home and he says, "Hey..... so you want another baby?" My response was, "No, but i feel like there is a baby that is suppose to be coming soon, why?" He began to tell me that he had one of those slow days and had time to think about things and he said i was right, he had the same feeling and that we weren't going to try, we were just going to let it happen on it's own, i agreed.

1 month later, i was feeling sick to my stomach, extremely tired and had a lot of fatigue! I just assumed i was over working myself and just needed some rest. The stomach aches started randomly, and i was getting really bad head aches, and thought i maybe had the touch of a stomach bug because its been going around. Well on mother's day i had really bad lower back pain, and felt very sick so we left my mom's i had a really weird feeling to take a pregnancy test, before i went to bed, i remembered not to argue with strong feelings like that, i had to go to the bathroom anyway and had a test on hand anyway, so i took it. I went to get a drink of water to take some tylenol and 3 minutes later went to check the test assuming it'd be negative, it wasn't! I looked at it and almost choked on my water! I sat there and cried for a few minutes to myself. asking myself how i was going to tell josh, IF i should tell josh. then put the test in my back pocket, gave josh a kiss and said "Thank you for the Mother's Day gift, i really wasn't expecting this so soon!" handed him the test and he says, "what is this?!" i told him to read it 2 lines means pregnant!" and he says, "you are lying! where did you get this?!" i laughed and told him i just took it and it is real, and he was speechless. I told him that this was as soon as it get's and asked what we were going to do? and he reminded me we didn't have a lot of money when we had Braiden and we made it, we lived with my parents living pay check to pay check and we had houston and made it just fine. He said this is obviously meant to be and everything will work out just fine, we will be taken care of.

So it is true, I am pregnant with #3! I am very scared but i am putting all of my faith into my heavenly father because he is the only one that knows the plan for us! My main concerns right now is, how am i going to fit 3 car seats in my little honda? it won't work i have tried fitting 3 car seats in there when i was babysitting a friends baby, and it just didn't work! Josh said he is going to try and get me a new car before we go to AZ for thanksgiving. Yes we are no longer going to AZ in december for christmas and new years because i am due JANUARY 13, 2012! So we are coming in November for thanksgiving! Another concern is Houston. he is my baby, he is so attached to me how will he do not being the baby anymore? and having to share me? Where we going to put another baby? I just have to remember that this is meant to be, Houston will be fine with another brother or a sister and he will be so good to the baby and me. And obviously the baby will stay in mine and josh's room for the first 4 months and hopefully we will be into a house by then, or at least a bigger appartment. We shall see, i know everything will work out and fall into place when it is time, but i have to admit, not having a plan and not knowing what's going to happen, and being in control of things makes me nervous and a little crazy at times, but i have my rock (josh) reminding me it will be ok. he just knows everything will be ok! He is my better half and this is why we are so strong, because we help eachother through everything.

Besides that i am feeling pretty good, little sick randomly and emotional, but i feel great! We weren't going to tell anyone until my first appointment, but i went to arizona and people figured it out because i've put on a lot of weight and i'm already showing! First appointment will be coming soon, still trying to figure insurance crap out! I am just over 7 weeks now and will keep you all updated! Wish us luck! we're gonna need it!

the tests